Mile Nerd

Ok, 3 topics left. Lots to say, so here we go. I’ll paste some quotes from different readers under each topic because, frankly, your words have been WAY better than mine lately.

Topic 1 – What happens to MileNerd.com?
“If I compare it to the real life, it’s like a house demolition. A house that I used to live in. I watch that big metal thing hitting the house, the walls crumble. I may know that there’s a good cause for this but it won’t make me less sad.” -Alex

Over the last 2 weeks, I’ve learned that there are a lot of unseen impacts of words. It has been such a jarring thing to experience (in a good way). I really had no idea.  

There were a couple of good offers through the years for MileNerd that didn’t feel right. Those no longer exist. More recently, there was one reader who seemed like a good option. That didn’t quite work either. So, here’s what I’m planning with MileNerd.com…

“I respect your writing. Don’t leave us yet.” -Matthew

Unfortunately, my life/health are a bit challenging and blah blah blah. Long story short, I just can’t keep writing every day. At some point, someone connected to this blog will feel right…and I’ll transition to that person here. Until then, what I will do is keep the Top 25 Credit Card list updated once a month. I know a bunch of you use it, so there’s no need for me to “demolish the house” completely. Obviously, January has been a little crazy…but I’ll pick that up for February 1st. As always, I’ll try to keep the offers current…but it won’t be perfect. If you see out-of-date information, I always appreciate when you let me know. It’s a big help with the editing.  

“You will be so missed.  I’m not sure what I will miss more…your eloquence or your humor. When you are writing from your heart about matters that mean something to you you are incredibly eloquent.  I’m not sure if you truly know that but you should.” -Lori

Of course not. More often than not, I’ve completely bumbled my attempts to communicate. But what I did realize over the last 2 weeks was that some of you cared less about what was written here than you did about how it was written. It’s hilarious when you think about it. A blog built on “the fewest words possible” and more readers seem to look forward to the long posts. Again, it’s just not possible to continue. But I’ll try not to “demolish the house” completely. While I still have the website (for however long that is)…I’ll put up one post a month just to continue SOME writing. I’m aware the new group isn’t for everyone and some of you just want to keep reading something. It really won’t be much more than a retired guy who still goes to his office Christmas party. But I’ll keep writing something on the first of the month. Not sure what that will be…it could be a post about my love for nachos…or maybe an essay on Michael Jordan’s weird love for baggy jeans. To be very clear, this is still retirement…the days of 5 posts a week about miles and points are over for good. I’m just talking about popping in once a month so I don’t take a wrecking ball to the walls. Nothing more.

Finally, I assume there are at least some who show up for the actual original purpose of the blog…short deal posts without the fluff. If that’s the case, I think anyone (who has interest in it) could duplicate that aspect of this in a much better way. By using tools that weren’t as common 8 years ago. I think this is all someone would need to do to provide the same service as the short deal post side of MileNerd…

• Start a very specific Twitter account.
  • Link to deals (not articles about deals) with a simple, one-sentence description.
  • Only significant deals. And only in this travel niche.
  • None of the fluff. Limit it to stuff almost everyone is interested in. Status match offers, great rental car promos, 10,000 Amex point promos, a great new card offer, etc.
  • No small talk. No chatter. No conversations on that account. Just the significant deals. Nothing else.
  • Again, no links to articles or blog pages. Just point to the deal with a short description.
  • No concern for increasing followers. And, obviously, no links to pimp bloggers. Very simple. Stick to the formula. Repeat.
  • There are typically not more than 10 deals per week that really matter to the people who want this type of service. Every blog has a different purpose, but the audience in the niche I’m referring to is only concerned with the good stuff. And they want it simple. So, if you’re tweeting with that account much more than 10 times a week…it’s getting too complicated. If you want to focus on a different niche like gift card offers, you can also set up a different account for that.
  • I’m not sure anyone is interested in doing it like that…but, if so, I think it’s an easy way to replace the simplicity/no fluff deal portion of MileNerd. That said, it does seem (ironically) that the original purpose of this wasn’t really the main thing for many readers who loved this place.

Topic 2 – The response to last week’s post

“I am literally fighting back tears. I commend you for taking that step and putting that story out there. It’s not easy to do and I’m sure you spent awhile even bringing yourself to post it. Thank you. Thank you for having that courage to post it.” – Sophia

I mean, it wasn’t just one post. Your emails throughout the last 2 weeks have been incredible. But so many were about the Partition post in particular. Some from people who’d never written to a blogger/stranger before. It seemed to resonate in a different way. So, I feel like I owe a somewhat articulate response here…

I spent so much time in my life searching (desperately) for validation. Good chance I wasn’t alone in doing that. Maybe it’s just part of our human experience. But, at some point, I felt like I stopped. You grow up…or at least grow old…and don’t crawl around begging for approval in quite the same way. The thing is…when you do receive it…the impact still hits you. It gets into your heart in unexpected ways. The last 2 weeks have really kicked the shit out of me (to put it poetically). The recent feeling of connection to you guys has been unlike anything I’ve felt over the 8 years of doing this. For example, reader Micah actually set up a GoFundMe page to raise money for what would be my dream project.

Oh, and I’ve never met Micah.

That’s off-the-charts ridiculous. Not something I’ve ever experienced.

I thought about it for a few days and finally asked her to take the page down.

Am I nuts? Well, of course, but I’m certainly not anti-money. Case in point…I had one reader (Joe) who actually sent me a Venmo payment to say thank you. He said put it aside for whenever the documentary becomes possible. And I’m sure as hell keeping it.  

Again, this last 2 weeks was incredible.

Really abnormal.

As far as the GoFundMe…I just can’t post a money request for a documentary that might never happen. I’m in no position to start working on it right now, have nothing (other than one dude’s Venmo payment) to put towards it, and am not close to being able to start on it. The 5 or 6 of you who made GoFundMe offers (crazy generous as you are) were probably not going to make a big dent. Unless one of you is secretly Bill Gates. But, if that’s the case, what the hell are you doing collecting points? Anyway…I don’t know what else to say…promoting a GoFundMe page for a documentary that might never happen didn’t feel right. That’s why I asked her to take it down.

I deeply appreciate all of your words about that post…Joe and Micah, you guys are incredible…and the others who wanted to contribute are too. Maybe one day it’ll happen. If not, I did get plenty out of telling the story here and hearing your responses.

Topic 3 – Nerdville

“I am sad to see the MileNerd blog come to an end, but I absolutely would like to move forward with the new evolution of the next chapter in this saga.” -Valerie

The foundation for this group will be to construct a team of friends. We’ll start with our common interests – like miles, points, deals, and travel – and then we’ll grow from there. Here’s a quick way of knowing if it’s a good fit or not:

 Probably not a good fit if you:

• Are wishy-washy about the idea or only moderately interested,
• Think this will be like any other group,
• Will always feel that deals matter more than relationships,
• Could typically be described as difficult to be around, a pill, or a douche.

Probably will be a good fit if you:

• Are excited about the idea and have room in your life for this,
• Think of yourself as a deal and/or travel person,
• Are interested in connecting and sharing,
• Believe you are a good team player.

What will it grow into? We’ll need to wait and see. From a deal perspective, it’s certainly easier to talk in a private group than it is on a public blog. But it’s going to be about us, not me. We’d be screwed if I’m the smartest person there. Luckily, there’s basically no chance of that. It needs to be a real team in every sense. And, obviously, size is a factor. This is still coming from MileNerd, so “the biggest possible group” absolutely is not the goal. I’m looking for quality. But I also don’t want to make it seem like a chopping block process either. Here’s what I know…

Add a step of DOING and it typically eliminates quite a few people. Even if the DOING is just sending an email. So, if you’re interested, don’t feel like this is some kind of pointless lottery or something. If you really want to be part of it, let me know and I’ll do my part – which is trying to figure out how to make it work.

Let’s do it like this, guys. If you’re interested, please do the following:

• Send me a quick note with the subject Nerdville. Most of you already have my email address, but if not, the contact button is on the top of the page.
• Write anything you’d like to get out of the group. It could be a long description or a single word. Anything you feel like saying.
• Obviously, I’m going to get quite a few emails. I’ll need to organize this. The main thing at this point will be having individual conversations to figure out the right fit. It’s a ton of work, so I’ll probably just type a pre-written set of questions I can use to get to try and get to know you, where you’re coming from, etc. Give me a couple of weeks to reply to these emails please. Eventually, I’ll also need someone to help me with some tech stuff. But not yet.
• It’s going to be a lot of initial work but I believe it will be well worth the effort. I know there’s a unique group here. I see this as the beginning of some great relationships and a VERY special place. Please just give me a little time to get it all set up.
• If you’re a “heavy hitter” who is uninterested in friendships and a group like the one I described above…but would like to get into a different small group with similar types, you can send a note too. Just let me know what you’re looking for and I’ll see if I can figure something different out for you as well.

If you have any expertise – credit cards, travel, spending, reselling, booking awards, technical glitches, finding loopholes, or anything else – it’s obviously a big plus. We’ll talk about that soon. For now, just a quick email to let me know you’re interested is great. Even if your main skill is that you’re a great team player and eager to grow, that’s helpful. It has to start with friendship. Even on a basic level, friends don’t treat each other with any of the all-too-familiar online BS – dickishness, speaking in code, talking down to other, trying to make them feel small, putting deals over relationships, etc. Those aren’t the types of people who can make this special. It’s irrelevant how sharp someone is if they don’t really want to be on a team.

Finally…

If the group isn’t for you, no problem at all. You can still always reach out to me with any questions. Or if you ever want to share any comments, rumors, deals, rants, etc. I write back to everyone so, if you don’t get a reply, please check your spam folder. I guess, for some of you, this is probably goodbye. If that’s the case, please feel free to keep in touch. I’m not on any social media other than a personal Facebook page listed on the sidebar. Pretty inactive there. If this is, in fact, goodbye…thank you for your support. I tried my best to provide you something of value. It has been a real pleasure. The days of this being a daily miles and points blog are now officially over. For the last time…

Have a great weekend, nerds!

We’re closing in on the end of the week here, guys…

So, have the last few days been intense?

Uh…

-Will Vanna and Pat end the next Wheel of Fortune with super awkward banter?
-Is LAX a bad airport?
-Does Superman weirdly wear underwear on the outside of his pants?

(For non-game show fans, the answer to all of those is “of course”)

I think a big part of why I wrote Friday’s post was because you deserve to know how I’m wired. But, for 8 years, many of you didn’t even know I was an Indian guy.

(In fairness, I probably didn’t even know that myself until I was 23 or so)

I wrote in one way for a long time here and the last 2 weeks have been different. But I don’t need this level of attention. I’m good. So, let’s bring it back to you today…

The best part of this 8 years was Forrest Gumping this special group of people together – You.

The worst part was not REALLY bringing this group of people together…except in a Yahoo Mail inbox.

(Yes, I’m well aware that it’s strange to still use Yahoo Mail)

The end of a daily blog is one thing…but do you really think I’m about to slam the door on you?

Please.

MileNerd was never about numbers…and there’s no desire to “grow” in a that sense…so why do we need to do it as a blog? What if I can give you the same thing in a MUCH better way?

I’d like to take this private.

I’d like to stop making it a one-person monologue.

And I’d like to take these “could be” friendships and actually start building those relationships.

If it isn’t clear enough yet, I’m talking about bringing this group together. Building a team. A place where we can all connect, rather than sitting around listening to me talk about Tom Cruise. For lack of a better name, why don’t we call it NerdGroup for now. Or maybe Nerdville? Either one. Here’s what I see…

No bullshit, you guys are unique. It’s certainly not the “normal” collection of people found on most mile/point blogs. This really shouldn’t be limited to one voice. In fact, I strongly believe the last 8 years have been about bringing the right people together.

I see Nerdville as a real group of friends. I believe, after a year or two of relationships growing…you’ll basically have a friend wherever you go in the country. That’s how I see it coming together. Sound too good to be true? If so, then it’s probably not the right fit for you. It isn’t just going to be some surface-level Facebook or Slack group. This will be something different. Like MileNerd was. And it certainly won’t be for everyone. So, tomorrow, if you’re excited about the sound of that…I’ll tell you my vision.

Dear Fellow Nerds:

What’s more teary-eyed than a roomful of millennials watching puppy videos on Youtube?

This guy.

(Damn, that made no sense)

Emotions are weird, right? You really can’t plan or prepare for them…they just kind of show up. Man, this last couple of weeks…

Yesterday morning, I even had a voicemail waiting for me. It was someone I’d never spoken to in my life. A man saying something like, “Is this MileNerd? Can you please call me back?”

(After typing that, I realize it would probably be creepy under different circumstances)

But I called him back and it wasn’t creepy AT ALL. Just an incredibly sweet conversation between two people who’d never spoken before. It made two days a little brighter. And there have been quite a few of those conversations over the last few days (granted, this was the only one that happened over the phone). Emotions are a surprise. But, man, there have been a lot of surprises lately.

No big secret…I’ve had strong opinions about the ways people interact over technology. Comment sections, social media, and the whole anonymity thing…no shortage of weird stuff happening there. The “growth” of technology has totally changed the way people communicate.

Here’s a quick story…

My youngest sister is 15 years younger than me. A few years ago, she was out at a restaurant/bar. Teenage years. A normal, somewhat shy boy from school…a kid she never really talked to…was also at the restaurant/bar. They didn’t speak or even look at each other. Hadn’t all year. But he sent her a text message.

It read, “My girlfriend and I are looking to add someone in the bedroom. Would you be interested?”

Let’s be honest…that interaction would have been VERY different without the crutch of technology. Take away the iPhone and here’s how shy teenage boys approach girls at restaurants…

By awkwardly walking over, mumbling something incoherently, and sweating profusely. Eventually, an ill-timed voice crack ruins the moment…

But there’s something about summoning the balls to actually connect as a human being. We grow from it. And hiding behind phones and computers changed the way people relate to each other. We’re able to behave differently than we do when exposed in the real world. If that kid at the restaurant had to actually walk over and speak, VERY different words would have come out of his mouth.

8 years ago, when I decided there wasn’t going to be a comment section here…it was a conscious choice. I wanted to distance myself from the weirdness – the ways that people behave when hiding.

Years later, I’ve learned some big lessons from you guys. Real connections happen over technology too. For example, here’s one of the emails from yesterday…

Paul – I’ve been reading MileNerd this past week with sadness in my heart, knowing that one of the final bastions of honesty in the points world sounds like it’s coming to an end. I’ve particularly enjoyed these last few posts because they include much more of a personal element, and I’m able to get to know you as a person more than you as a blogger.

As I read today’s post, particularly that last section targeted to bloggers, I couldn’t help but feel ashamed. You’re right. You pretty much always have been. I’ve tried to be honest and straightforward for my readers, but damn it if I didn’t have thoughts of greed and other unsavory thoughts in my head at times over the years. Sometimes I acted on them, and looking back I feel shame.

Things have been busy in my normal life and I haven’t prioritized my blog, but I recently brought back Travel Summary. I still don’t write as much as I want to, but I’ll say this: I made a decision to not have any ads or affiliate links, and to not care about traffic, and it feels kind of liberating. Not that I ever chased those things before, but it feels great to just know I can write freely again like I did when I first started when no one found my blog except by accident.

Years ago you mentioned my blog in a few posts. I was and am grateful, because the “Milenerd bump” in traffic was and I’m sure still is a real thing. Then somehow we connected, and I remember you suggested we should meet up since I’m in OC and I believe you were in LA at the time. I regret not following up and doing so. I don’t know much about you, but from what I do know you’re the kind of guy I would want to be friends (or at least acquaintances) with.

If you’re still around SoCal, I’d love to be able to meet up with you for a meal or a coffee. Let me know if you’re interested – it would be an honor to finally meet a person I respect so much.

Again, the point isn’t to pat myself on the bat. I actually wasn’t even saying anything about ads…I was really only talking about being honest. But, here’s my point about that email…

I’ve never met this man. Still, somehow, we’ve made real impacts on each other. He opened himself up to me yesterday in a way that plenty of my “real world” friends never have. We were helpful and supportive of each other. Really, how different is that from a friendship? As much as this can feel like sending words out into the void, relationships are being built.

Aren’t we supposed to be so different and divided these days? Well, that hasn’t been my experience lately. Not with you guys. This week alone, you’ve expressed yourselves, opened up, shared, and even talked about loss. We’ve never met but it sure as hell feels like we’re friends. In a sense, I chose not to have a comment section because I wanted to detach. Your warmth makes that the last thing I want to do 8 years later. And that is a surprise. Thank you for being so willing to connect. And for impacting me in such meaningful ways.  I guess, sometimes, we do that without even knowing it’s happening.

No way to let this final week pass without sharing some thoughts on the current state of this game. The first (and most important) question – Is this hobby dead?

Of course not.

If there are points to be earned, there’s still a game to be played.

(And discounted travel to be had)

That said, for most of us, the peak years are probably over. For a long time, we weren’t a blip on anyone’s radar. Companies weren’t worried about weird little nerds trying to vacation for free. We were approved for credit cards by the bucketload. Doors were wide open all over the place.

Today?

Well, it’s different. The “gamers” are definitely on radars. We’re planned for, limited, and sometimes shut down. Plus, there’s a ton of us now. If we look at this hobby as Tom Cruise…we’ve in the moment when he laughed like a psychotic clown and jumped all over Oprah’s couch. Sure, there are still years of good movies to come (Tropic Thunder, some decent Mission Impossible sequels, etc) but peak Cruise isn’t walking through that door.

(I apologize for that exceptionally strange paragraph – even by my standards)

Anyway, the point is, there’s still a game to play. We’re no longer in the prime years. But, so what? We roll on…

Credit Cards
With limits from Chase, Barclays, and Bank Of America…plus all the once-in-a-lifetime stuff at American Express…it’s harder than ever to get approved for cards. Bonuses are challenging. So what do we do?

At this point, it’s helpful to have access to other social security numbers (not in a shady way). I’m talking about your relatives and friends who aren’t interested in credit card signups. They come in handy. Get whatever you can, then get some cards in their name, and then ask someone else. If it’s possible in your life, that’s a pretty effective strategy in these changing times. Just stay organized.

No matter who applies, make sure you keep screenshots of the terms. You never know when you might be in for a bonus fight.

Spending
Since getting approved for cards is challenging these days, spending a lot of money is another way to go. Obviously, it’s NEVER something to mess with if there are any issues keeping debt under control. The main ways you guys have been spending large amounts are: with businesses, friend/family-owned businesses using your cards, reselling, or buying gift cards. The last option is (by far) the most common.

We’ve definitely passed the peak Jerry Maguire years for Mastercard and Visa gift cards. Not dead, but we’ve seen better days. Another option is buying discounted third-party gift cards (Starbucks, Target, Best Buy, etc). It takes some rate-checking with gift card exchanges to make sure you can break even. Of course, the idea is always free points. A little profit is even better. The main concern is making sure that gift card exchange is trustworthy. I should mention a relatively new one that’s run by a friend of the blog. I think there might be some strict volume requirements to remain an active user there but, considering I have no personal experience with it, I have no clue.  I’ve just known them to be honest people. They might be at capacity, but it’s worth checking out and adding to your list of options – if you’re into third-party gift cards.

Travel
One thing that seems to still be in its Rain Man peak is flight deals. And occasional hotel + flight package promos. Really keep your eyes open (particularly if you’re flexible with dates). Websites like TheFlightDeal and SecretFlying keep popping up. Typically, you need to book those deals quickly. Be ready to jump if a great opportunity comes along. For some of you, it’s also worth keeping an eye on the travel category of Slickdeals and the Mileage Run deals on Flyertalk.

Blogs
I’ve gotten the question recently – “Which blogs would you recommend once you’re gone?” From a deal perspective, it’s not really necessary to read a long list of them anymore. The good stuff is posted on dozens (maybe even hundreds) of different websites. At this point, Doctor Of Credit pretty much has everything covered. He does one thing I disagree with (which I’ll talk about in a second), but he doesn’t lie to readers. I’m not aware of many other blogs with trustworthy opinions on credit cards. TravelBloggerBuzz is another good one that comes to mind. It’s run by a man named George (who knows he’s driven me nuts on more than one occasion). But I respect that he’ll never mislead you. Neither guy will push you into bad deals. And, as far as I know, that’s still a rare thing for blogs. I can’t say for sure…my focus has been on the people here. Just be selective about who you take advice from. As always, I’m not a fan of Bowtie, The Points Guy, or most of Boarding Area.

Before moving on, I’d like to speak to any bloggers who are reading. Probably my last opportunity to do so here. I know a few of you and am pretty sure there are others lurking in the shadows (possibly in a creepy Hamburglar mask or something). Bloggers, since I’m on my way out of the world of miles and points blogs, let me ask something that I’ve always been curious about…

When you see higher bonuses on a card but talk up your inferior offer as “the best available” – how does that feel? Or, when you won’t post great offers because they don’t pay you – is that a strange sensation? Wait, I don’t actually care. Let’s do this another way…

Dear honest blogger who has chosen to link to those types of websites-
Why do you do it?
Allow me to answer that. We both know it’s not about a “hat tip.” It’s a big circle jerk you do for return traffic. Well, you don’t mislead readers on your website, right? So, take a stand and stop sending newbies to pimps. You know very well the only “person” you need to credit for a Hertz rental car promo is Hertz. That’s who “broke” the deal. A new Citibank card? Guess where that deal comes from…Citibank. You choose to see it a different way because you don’t want to make waves. But I’m asking this one thing of you on my way out. Take a stand. Protect your readers. Just because you’re not lying to them doesn’t mean you should send them to websites that will. At least think about it?

This chapter of “Nerdy Weirdo Says Goodbye” was supposed to be about my biggest missteps here. Those are coming. But I need to respond to something and am clueless how to do it appropriately. Friday’s post was extremely meaningful to me. Dim bulb that I am, I didn’t expect it to resonate so much with anyone else.

I’m going to share a sample of the emails from the weekend. If ego stroking were the goal, I’d have done this all along rather than waiting 8 years. No, the reason I want to post them now is to give you a feel for being in my shoes. A sense of what I’ve been reading for the last 3 days. Why? Because I really want you to understand how difficult it is to stop. After seeing this level of support, hopefully you’ll experience why I say this is a team. I’m dealing with some challenges right now that make it impossible to continue another year. But it’s VERY hard to write these last posts and I’m trying hard to give you a glimpse.

Even on the island, Tom Hanks would rather talk to an antisocial volleyball than be alone. Being cared about is something we all need, right? We all want to connect. So, imagine waking up to an email like this from someone you’ve never even been in the same room with:

“Good morning MileNerd,

I have only had the pleasure of reading your blog the last couple of years. Wish I knew better several years ago. Thank you for the great post this morning, although I’m sure it was most difficult at times for you to share with your readership. For me it was difficult to read at times, but I think it will be of help to me in the future.

I have struggled for too many years now with the death of one of my children, and haven’t got to the point where I really need to express myself in so many ways. As hard as your post was to read, it is also somehow inspiring.

I wish you the greatest success in coming to terms with this part of your life, and wish you the best in deciding how to document it in the future. I will truly miss your blog, and wish you all the best.”

Hopefully that gives you a better idea of how difficult this week is. Another reader shared the story of losing his mother and how the timing of this post impacted his life. I mean…this is a miles and points blog. From a guy who posts goofy pictures. Another reader drafted a GoFundMe page for A PERSON SHE’S NEVER MET that’s ready to be published if I choose to share it. Obviously, I’m overwhelmed. And confused. And touched. So, I’ll post a sample of the emails below, but need to balance it out with an equally important topic – my biggest regrets from MileNerd. I owe some apologies. Here are the top 3 biggest ones:

-A little backstory. I grew up as an ultra-skinny Indian kid in West Virginia…6 feet tall and 145 pounds. Couldn’t gain a pound even after setting alarms in the middle of the night to drink weight-gainer milkshakes. Definitely hadn’t grown into my big nose. To put it mildly, I was NOT a ladies man. My role? Funny sidekick who girls talked to about the boys they actually liked. In college, I finally started putting on weight and looked slightly less awkward. For the first time, I was experiencing some attention from the opposite sex. But…here’s the thing…literally for another DECADE, every time a woman was attracted to me…I was legitimately confused. My internal monologue was, “Wait, you want me? The funny sidekick guy? I don’t understand.” My point is this…

Sometimes, our brains don’t catch up to their new reality. You think of yourself as the guy who can’t get a date… in the middle of a date. Or the “skinny guy” who is currently sucking in his gut. In these 8 years of blogging, I made some mistakes because my brain wasn’t caught up. This was the worst example…

Years ago, a lady started a miles and points blog. She reached out for some advice. I don’t remember what started annoying me about the conversations…she asked why I curse so much or something totally insignificant…and innocently asked if I’d mention her. The point is, she did nothing. I was WAY too harsh when mentioning her in a post. By all indications, she was a nice person who wasn’t misleading anyone. I embarrassed myself. And, what made it weirder…some people cheered me on for that. Leana, I apologize. I hope you’re still writing. My goal here was to help people and I did it with almost everyone who reached out. For some reason, I didn’t do that with you and I regret it to this day. There was no excuse for it. My brain didn’t understand that I had the power to hurt you…it was too busy protecting itself from being hurt.

-Next regret. When I started MileNerd, nobody was called out for anything. Dishonest bloggers were lying left and right with no pushback. I felt it was my responsibility to speak up. One of those early posts was called, “Why Everyone Sucks” or something similarly poetic. Decent writing for me at the time and there were many other posts like it. The thing is…

I made a big contribution to what I guess could be called “ranting culture” in this particular hobby. It spread quickly like a rash. And there’s a problem with that contribution…

If people start ranting for every little thing, it becomes indistinguishable noise. When everything is an “issue,” the real problems are drowned out. Logic should be the foundation. But, I’m regularly sent posts of people trying to “rant” about non-issues. Often in nonsensical ways. In fairness, it probably would have happened eventually with Twitter coming. A new generation of “hot takes” – often just dumb shit expressed with over-the-top emotion. A quick way to gain likes and cheers. Even if it was bound to happen, I’m the miles and points pioneer of it. Definitely helped create that mess. Another regret.

-Finally, this one has to do with you guys. The reason for no social media and no comment section was simple. How people communicate in those “areas,” in many cases, really weirds me out. That behavior often devolves into impersonal and cold internet talk. Sometimes rude. And I didn’t want to be a part of that. I wanted to connect to people in a human way. With very few exceptions, that’s what happened. People who send emails (in my experience) don’t dive into weird comment section behavior.

Well, somewhere along the line, it became obvious that MileNerd readers were a different bunch. I regret that I didn’t try a comment section to give you guys a chance to interact with each other. To form some relationships with the other special people here. I hope to remedy that very soon.

Ok, now that I’ve talked about the times I sucked, I feel a little more comfortable closing with some emails to help paint a picture of my weekend. And what I’m experiencing this week…

“Paul, I am so very sorry that your family’s history has had so much tragedy in it. As a Jew who lost family in the Holocaust, and who has known and loved survivors of that tragedy, I am not a stranger to how hard and complicated it is for the survivors and for their children.

If you “figure out a way to pursue my dream project again” please let your friends on the MileNerd list know about it. My bet is that I am not the only one who would step up to help you tell your story more broadly. And if not, that’s OK too. Again, I am surely not the only one who learned from reading Chapter 4, and while very saddened, I am glad to have been so enlightened.”

“I just read your posting on your life story. Oh, my! I don’t know what to say, other than THANK YOU for sharing. And of course, I am one of many that wish you the very best.”

“I came to this hobby only recently and discovered your blog even later. Thank you for your honest approach to miles and points. More, though, thank you for having the generosity to tell your personal story in these last posts. I’m a writer and editor, but I am unable to find the right words to tell you after reading about your family story. Best wishes to you in the next phase of your life. Take care.”

“Whether you have a duty to tell this story in another way, or should prioritize it over other things is not something where I can offer any insight. But if you were to start a kickstarter or gofundme, I think that I and other admirers would offer support. I came to your blog for the information. As I discovered that I don’t have the love for the miles game or the energy to play it, I slowly stopped reading miles and points blogs, but kept coming back here.  I’m not sure why, something about the writing or the love underlying it held onto me.”

“Hello, Mr. Nerd. Like many, many others, I am sad to see you go.  You have been a bright light in this world.

About 18 months ago, I started a travel blog — and I didn’t like it.  What I was writing wasn’t me.  I had the good fortune to speak briefly with Pauline Frommer (of Frommer’s Guide) who said, “Everyone is doing what you are doing” — which was writing just another blog with advertisers, click-bait, reviews, etc.  Who cares.

I spent a few months looking at blogs. There was nothing special about most of them. They were interchangeable and forgettable.

But I always liked yours: pithy, no nonsense, like-me-or-leave. I rebooted my blog, keeping in mind your model. I write for myself and I have fun.  I am officially launching it this week, and have almost a year of articles ready to publish (weekly).  Hooray!  I easily have enough material to last another four years.

My online magazine encourages other writers to submit their stories so I can publish on their behalf.  Those who do not have a blog of their own can still get their stories out there.

So, my virtual friend, if you ever decide you have something to say but no longer have the means, please visit my site at www.awaTravels.com.  You will always be welcome.”

“This will sound trite and shallow after yesterday’s post of yours, but I’ve read your blog for years. I cannot say thank you enough for the countless promotions, points, etc that you have alerted me and all your readers about. Your voice has come through over countless holiday/new years posts, I feel as if I know you.”

“You’ll be sorely missed, but I hope this means you are chasing your dream. Best of luck to you, and if you ever wonder past Kansas City, the beers and BBQ are on me as a thank you.”

“Words cannot express the gratitude I have for you.  Your blog has always been a wonderful source of information and humor.  I appreciate the time you’ve taken. I just finished ready the story of your father. Talk about a hard dose of reality.  Your old man is one tough guy.  What I have learned from my years as a family attorney, is that you really can’t judge a book by its cover. There are so many stories that people have which go untold and end up unknown or forgotten. I hope you will tell your father’s story one day, if not the story of the Partition. Thank your dad for me. Without him, we wouldn’t have you.”